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Self-Destruction to Self-Care

Each Breakthrough Brought Me to an Understanding of Myself

What is self-care? Society has led us to believe massages, facials, a clean diet, regular exercise, and quality sleep make up a complete self-care regimen, but this is only a tiny piece of holistic wellness. I began working with Linda Darin after my mom’s death and started a journey into self-care that I never expected. I lived like a robot, stuck in a toxic work environment, married to an addict, stuffing down all my emotions, just trying to survive each day. Self-care was a foreign language. I was so used to ignoring my feelings, worrying about everyone else’s feelings, and disconnecting from reality that there was no way I could care for myself. But, over the next four years, I have experienced shifts and transformations in body, mind, and soul with Linda’s spiritual guidance, gifts of healing, and intuitive counsel in all areas of my life.

Recently my father was rushed to the hospital, fearing he had suffered a stroke. I immediately returned to my mom’s final days when I ran away, unable to be present with her and my family. I was overwhelmed with sorrow, guilt, and grief. Linda reminded me to process these emotions by journaling and connecting them to the reality of what was happening now, not my past experiences. I cared for myself by speaking truthfully about what I wanted and booked a one-way ticket to be with my dad. Linda’s background in nursing was invaluable in guiding my dad and me as we met with all the medical professionals he needed after his diagnosis of Bell’s palsy and diabetes while in the hospital. At first, I was angry at my brothers for leaving all the responsibility for Dad’s follow-up care on my shoulders. Luckily, I had been working with Linda virtually and could continue our one-on-one sessions and energy healings online to work through my anger and transmute the negativity I was feeling.

Taking the focus off my needs and being selfless while caring for my dad was a big step forward in my self-care journey. Before working with Linda, I focused entirely on myself and my pain, closed off to giving or receiving love. Stepping up to be with my dad and attending to his needs despite disrupting my life showed the change I had undergone through Linda’s intuitive healing. I had to love and accept myself before being compassionate and loving towards others. The more I loved my dad, the more at peace I felt; the more connected to God and the source of this love inside me I became. I stayed for an entire month and built a new love relationship with myself and my dad, as we shared stories from my childhood and talked about our lives today and possibilities for the future. We had time to cook together, explore diabetic-friendly recipes, and go on daily walks.

In addition, I encouraged and helped him clear out clutter and organize his home. Creating a clean home environment is self-care; a home in disrepair and disarray reflects your inner turmoil. Our home was a disaster growing up. I was so ashamed that no one in my family talked about it or did anything to change it. We just ignored it. In The Darin Method®, we identified the behavior pattern rooted in my childhood of not taking care of the home, disassociating from the mess, and believing I wasn’t worthy of a clean home which was still manifesting in my life today. Through virtual energy and chakra healing, Linda delivered me from the bondage to the negative emotions of shame, panic, and unworthiness attached to this belief. Gaining awareness of how this traumatic experience affected me, Linda helped me create a new pattern of releasing clutter in my home and from an overflowing storage unit and building new habits to keep my home clean. Releasing my shame allowed me to hire help when I felt overwhelmed. I could ask for assistance. Because of my healing, I could approach my father’s clutter without judgment or anger. Excited by the cleaning we did together, he proudly tells me of his progress each time we talk on the phone.

A cluttered home was just one of the many patterns and beliefs Linda helped me identify in my story that no longer served me. I discovered I felt rejected by my mom, leading to feelings of inadequacy, which I covered up by the pattern of performing and competing with everyone around me, believing this would lead to acceptance. I would fall into shame and anger when I didn’t win or receive the praise I craved. The awareness of my reactions opened my eyes to why people did not want to be around me. With the assistance of Linda in weekly one-on-one intuitive counseling sessions, online energy healings, sound healing, and chakra clearings, I began to release these old patterns and beliefs. It created space for new thoughts and emotions that aligned with the woman God wanted me to become.

As I shared my story with Linda in our sessions, she helped me become aware that I was reacting to everyday life and relationship challenges as if they were traumatic events. I felt like I was being rejected by my mom whenever someone critiqued or challenged me. My pattern of overreacting in fear, panic, and shame, followed by tears, rage, or going flat and numb, confusing whoever was with me; they couldn’t understand what was happening. In the energy, sound, and chakra healing sessions, we moved through each chakra in the body and the emotions connected to them. Linda invoked the divine healing power to break the bondage to the clusters of dark feelings that had me locked in these harmful, reactive patterns of behavior from my childhood emotional trauma. As a result, I felt less attached to my past experiences with my mom. I didn’t have to hide in shame; I could speak truthfully and let God forgive and heal me. Linda’s gifts of healing, her connection to the divine, her ability to discern the truth in a story, and her assistance, love, and support helped deliver me from the bondage of these dark emotions, patterns, and beliefs in a way I couldn’t do on my own. Still, it required my commitment to decide to change. In addition, the transformational work in The Darin Method® opened my heart to more loving relationships with my family, friends, co-workers, and even strangers.

Developing a personal relationship with God was the most crucial part of my new way of living. Linda encouraged me to reconnect with my spirituality through the Experiencing God workshop. I had a connection to God through my church as a young girl, but I had not truly understood the power of talking to Him every day, repenting of my sins, and experiencing the gift of his forgiveness and love. My self-care begins with God’s love for me. God created me, I am not perfect, and still, I am accepted. Instead of beating myself up for my mistakes, God wants me to see them as learning opportunities, an integral part of this transformation journey. Receiving that love and compassion from God, despite my mistakes, I could begin to love myself and others and be at peace while still in the middle of my healing. I could also see that my mother’s death was an important marker in my life because it brought me to Linda Darin for spiritual healing and guided me back to God. It is genuinely not about a religion but a relationship with the divine that lives within me.

I sought help from Linda for grief counseling, but it opened a door for me to see myself and my life and that I needed healing in my mental, physical, and spiritual health. Beginning with a self-care journal, writing my emotions every day, giving gratitude for all I have in my life, and being honest about where I struggle and hurt helped me accept the light and dark within me. I was living selfishly, comparing and competing with everyone around me, and trapped in a bad marriage, but I could choose to change direction and change my heart and mind to be renewed by God. Linda supported my decision to leave my marriage and get a divorce. I was living in hell; my husband and I were suffering from mental health, addiction to alcohol, and spending beyond our means. We shopped and drank to numb and not face the truth of our toxic relationship.

The emotional toll of my marriage negatively affected my body. Physical ailments are often a result of our emotional pain. As a result, I was overweight, lazy, and had no sex drive. However, because of Linda’s nursing experience, I trusted her guidance for my physical health as she directed me to find a naturopathic doctor to do a full panel of bloodwork, examine hormone levels, and do a reset cleanse through food and supplements. Combined with a new workout regime that offered both stress relief and an outlet to release more emotions helped me feel like myself again, energetic, lighter, and excited to move forward in my life.

I had used my financial spending sprees and vacations to try to cover up the pain I was feeling from unresolved childhood trauma and a horrendous marriage. I was over eighty-thousand dollars in debt and didn’t know how I would get out from under it. Through the energy of money service, Linda taught me how my emotions and beliefs drove my behaviors with money. I discovered that I thought more money would make me feel safe because of growing up in poverty and the stress that comes with it. Linda guided me to a financial course grounded in spirituality to learn how to budget and create a debt snowball plan which provided a  financial advisor for accountability. Finally, I understood the power my ideas about money had and how that negatively affected my life. Choosing to change my patterns and beliefs towards money, I was becoming responsible with my money for the first time and had hope that I could pay off my debt if I followed my plan.

In my drive to earn higher and higher salaries and find validation through my career, I accepted jobs out of desperation instead of looking for the role that would best suit me. Through The Darin Method ®, Linda and I created a job autobiography, mapping each job from babysitter to my current career as a designer in New York City. I learned that I had a pattern of accepting the first job offer just because they wanted me. I was afraid that no one else would want me if I turned it down! As I began a new job search after my company closed during the Covid crisis, Linda helped me process each interview and offer. We evaluated how I showed up in the job interview and if the proposals were what I wanted. I turned down lucrative job offers for the first time in my career because I knew I would be miserable at those companies in their environment and ended up in a role that I love and supports my well-being and financial goals.

My self-care journey has required patience and perseverance to work through my blocks and challenges through self-awareness, self-acceptance, and deciding not to give up when I’ve fallen back into old patterns. Choosing to keep pushing forward on my path to healing with God’s love and power to forgive has been the greatest act of self-care I could ever offer to myself. Each breakthrough brought me a new understanding of myself, allowing me to see a future I had never thought possible before I met Linda.

Self Care is loving my dad more, being less selfish, and assisting with his clutter. Self Care healed inner rejection and helped me have healthier relationships. Self-care is a relationship with God, journaling my emotions and gratitude daily. Self Care is taking care of my physical health and financial debt and learning about what my purpose is in my career.

Self-care is not just polishing the outer shell of our bodies but nurturing the divine light that lives within us all. Working with Linda showed me that light is in me no matter how broken I am, and her assistance, love, and support have brought healing, balance, and hope into my life.

Through Linda’s holistic and spiritual therapy, Linda helped me find peace, hope, and the balanced life I deserve. Self-care is showing up for myself, which has been the greatest gift of worthiness.