Aging is a natural process, yet no one teaches you how to grow old; instead, you hear that getting old isn’t easy. While healing grief, I have gained experience and learned some lessons as my eighty-three-year-old father and stepmother are dying slowly and gradually, losing their independence and requiring more care.

Since 2017, I have assisted them with their finances, medical care, and living arrangements because they could no longer manage independently. Since Linda Darin is a nurse, she advised the help of a social worker and elder care lawyer. I learned about estate planning, planning for assisted living and nursing home placements, and understanding Medicare and Medicaid.

I discovered childhood wounds while working with Linda in grief counseling and The Darin Method ®. I learned to cope with losing my family’s health due to illness and the trauma of my unmet childhood needs from the absence of an unhealthy upbringing.

Grieving Loss of Good Health Due to Illness

Linda assisted me with Spiritual Healing from trauma. I had opened entry points of negative energies from a childhood wound of abandonment due to my father’s absence from working many hours and my parent’s divorce.

Our relationship became estranged after my dad remarried his wife, who had an untreated mental illness and moved to another state. I was jealous of my stepmother for monopolizing his time due to her illness and harbored resentment for his leaving. From my wound of abandonment, I developed bitterness, unforgiveness, and covetousness, which were entry points that allowed negative entities to attach to those emotions, hardening my heart and damaging my relationship with my father.

I reunited after ten years of being estranged from my father in 2017. I received a call that they needed help while they lived in New Jersey. I live in Westchester County, and the ride is three hours long. I was shocked when I saw how messy they looked and barely got by from their poor living conditions. I was angry that he kept their situation a secret and felt burdened that my dad didn’t care for himself, and I had to pick up the pieces. With Linda’s Spiritual cleansing of negative energy, I learned to process my dark emotions and release strongholds that negatively affected my physical and mental health.

I initially felt overwhelmed because so much was involved in their care. Anger and frustration erupted out of my soul because I felt powerless and couldn’t control my situation. After my dad had a fall that landed him in the hospital, we decided it would be best for them to move back to Westchester, closer to me. I had the daunting task of cleaning and selling his house and finding assisted living for them. This situation brought up fear, insecurity, and my old childhood patterns of wanting to be in control to feel safe, and when I wasn’t in control, I was a victim of my circumstances.

There were many factors to consider in finding an affordable home for two that provided outstanding care. I began looking through reviews, visiting facilities, and asking many questions. I discussed what I reviewed with Linda’s intuitive counseling, weighed the options, and finally decided. I also received Energy healing online sessions to release my fear and insecurity, accept things as they were, focus on things I could control, and surrender to what I couldn’t.

I visited and accompanied them to many outside doctor appointments and gave up more time as my stepmother’s kidney disease progressed and required more care. During Covid, they were isolated for months and couldn’t socialize or receive visitors, and their health deteriorated markedly. In 2021, I moved them to a new facility because I wasn’t happy with their care.

Following their move, they were in and out of the hospital, and after my stepmother had a fall, she went into a nursing home where she also received kidney dialysis. I was moving a few steps ahead and one step back as I shifted between the anger and depressive stages of grief. I felt drained and unmotivated as grieving took much of my energy, and I burnt out from focusing too much on them and not taking the time to self-care.

My exhaustion brought on feelings of self-pity, unappreciation, and vindictiveness, giving dark forces access to my thoughts. My victim mentality resurfaced, leading me to keep my father separated from his wife for months.

Linda encouraged me to self-care, go on outings and try new things. As I took better care of myself through journaling, taking walks, kayaking, visiting gardens, processing through counseling, and receiving multiple clearings through Energy Healing and Spiritual transformation sessions, I am releasing from hate, vindictiveness, and victim mentality. I consciously chose to forgive my father and stepmother, and myself.

Through forgiveness, I let go of hurt, pain, and bitterness and developed empathy, compassion, and a sense of peace. I made myself available to help my dad visit his wife, assisting with diaper and clothing changes and using his wheelchair without neglecting my needs or feeling resentful. Earlier this year, in 2023, my father and his wife were reunited as he required nursing home placement after another hospitalization. In May, my stepmother decided to stop her dialysis treatments, and since then, I have assisted in her end-of-life care and preparing for her funeral. I have now come to terms and have accepted that my dad and his wife are at the end stage of their life, and I am cherishing each day and letting go.

Grieving Through Absence of a Healthy Upbringing

Through weekly intuitive counseling, Linda helped me process the absence of a healthy upbringing due to my DNA lineage to mental illness and not having support from my family as they aged. Through The Darin Method ®, she showed me patterns and beliefs still lagging from my childhood, such as comparing myself to others and wanting the nurturing family I couldn’t have. Through Linda’s spiritual and holistic healing, I learned these patterns had dark forces attached to entry points of my shame, jealousy, and rejection from childhood. Through her deliverance gifts and my daily repentance, I am free!

Letting go involves so much grief, but I persevered one step at a time. I was patient with my grief and wanted to heal. I learned from my past that not grieving for my brother’s murder locked me into anxiety, depression, and hating God for over 20 years. I blocked out my feelings and turned to alcohol and New Age practices which disconnected me entirely from God.

Through Christian Faith Healing, I joined bible studies and prayer groups and participated in a weekly workshop, Experiencing God, taught by Linda. It was not about a religion but a relationship with God. I began embracing God’s love through groups, weekly counseling sessions, self-care, and spending time with my father. I shed tears and sorrow as I processed my childhood and mental illness and talked about memories from the past with my dad.

I learned to accept that love and connection were absent in my childhood, but I forgave. I gained new strength, and my faith and hope increased as I started cultivating a relationship with God and continued the process. Although I had depression for a long time, I am no longer afraid to age.

Here are some of the highlights of aging that I learned working with Linda Darin:

  • Keep longing and dreaming and having hope.
  • Keep loving.
  • Keep learning, exercise, rest and eat well. Take care of yourself.
  • Keep laughing and socializing and be a part of life.
  • Keep working, volunteering, and having hobbies. Keep your mind sharp to remain fruitful.
  • Keep leaning on God and growing in that relationship.

I am so grateful to have a mentor, educator, and spiritual, holistic healer, Linda Darin, to guide me through this grieving process. It has been such a blessing! I had no idea what God was up to when I began this journey six years ago, but He has been molding my character and healing my soul one fragment at a time through Linda’s Holistic Therapy Services. Although the grieving process is challenging, it was necessary for my growth and transformation. I can celebrate how far I have come!

I have healed some old wounds and shifted my thinking, behavior patterns, and belief systems with God’s grace and healing power. I am no longer isolated or drinking alcohol to cope. I have hope now, whereas I felt hopeless and powerless before, which was at the core of my anger. I can adapt to new situations more quickly and confidently and not go into doom and gloom, thinking life is a struggle. I am no longer afraid to be alone, as I can do things independently without feeling abandoned or inadequate.

I can live one day at a time and let go.