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From Trapped in Childhood Patterns to True Healing

I Could Not See, But Now I Know The Truth!

 

I found Linda Darin after the death of my mother when I Googled spiritual grief counseling. I felt so lost and overwhelmed by my pain and loss. Choosing to work with Linda was the first step towards healing my soul and finding a personal relationship with God. Linda helped me heal the worst of my grief and come out of the depression. I tried to ignore my feelings and just push on with my life after my mom’s death.

 

Through weekly intuitive counseling, chakra healings, and sound healings, I gained so much clarity. Linda gave me time and space to express all the emotions I was dissociating and disconnecting from myself. She understood that I had a troubled relationship with my mom, even though I did not want to admit it. Running away from her death bed to go back to work should have clued me to the anger and resentment I felt towards my mom!

 

Linda suggested we explore my early life through The Darin Method®, first telling my story from birth to five, to uncover the roots of my issues. I tried to push down my feelings of loneliness and pain by spending sprees to dress the part of a successful NY designer. I wanted to be perfect, thinking that would make people love me, but the fake perfectionism just pushed them away.

 

I was a workaholic, trying to prove I was the best at my job and ended each week with a drinking binge to relieve the stress of it all, which eventually turned into drinks every night.

 

I also felt trapped in an abusive marriage with a man who also had a mental illness, depression, and alcoholism. The patterns and beliefs rooted in every struggle, every tumultuous relationship, every job loss was someone else’s fault. I was blaming everyone but myself for my problems.

 

My first attempt at telling my story was all a lie. I painted a picture of an idyllic childhood in the country. Ironically, I’d learned to lie and hide from my family. There was so much shame surrounding how we lived, living from home to home, barely getting by as my dad only worked seasonally.

 

I also learned to bury all my dark emotions, which I could not tolerate. Because of this long-established habit of lying and hiding, I glossed over all the ugly parts of my childhood. I did not understand that these lies were the keys to breaking me free from my pain, and the illusion of a happy childhood would not allow me to heal.

 

As I went into a second attempt at processing my childhood through The Darin Method®, I spent a lot of time in conversation with my dad to get the truth of my story from birth to five. Linda provided a list of critical questions to ask him to help me get the whole picture.

 

I was amazed at what we uncovered! There were so many details of my parents’ early relationship and my first five years mirrored in my adult life. The hardest part to accept was that we were all suffering from different forms of mental health, such as depression and anxiety, and I never knew that I needed help! My mom was even a nurse. How could she not know what was happening in our family?

 

Being honest with Linda as she mentored and guided me as I shared my true story allowed God to heal me through her work. I had new hope to change my life and break free from the bondage of patterns and beliefs in my lineage.

 

Through processing childhood emotions with The Darin Method® and becoming aware of these patterns and beliefs, I had the choice to change the trajectory of my life. I could learn to be mature, accountable, and responsible. I began to feel all my emotions, light and dark, and stop dissociating and disconnecting from them, making me feel crazy!

 

I left a toxic marriage, I stopped drinking, and I got control of my finances. I began to pray, repenting from lying and hiding, perfectionism, jealousy, anger, bitterness, selfishness, and workaholism. With God in my heart, I have hope. This process takes one day at a time, but I’ve seen evidence of God’s work in my life as I am open to being molded and I am teachable.

 

The most transformational experience as I worked through the healing process of The Darin Method® was Linda using guided soul healing. Linda guided me on a journey into the spiritual plane where my soul, from birth to five years old, spoke to me and showed me the family I was born.

 

I felt my mother’s deep sadness and depression when she was pregnant with my twin brother and me. I experienced my twin brother’s love as we held onto each other so tightly in the womb, comforting each other as her sadness surrounded us. We were physically cold the first night we were home from the hospital—my dad told me we turned blue in our crib on that winter night.

When we were born, my older brother’s jealousy was profound, and it came between him and my mom. My loneliness and disconnection from my family and lack of proper bonding with my mother were deep within my heart center. While she was pregnant, my mom’s deep sorrow and panic were because she didn’t know how they would provide for two more babies!

 

I felt God allowed me to understand what my mother was going through to feel compassion for her. I could begin to forgive my mom for not loving me the way I wanted to be loved because she was depressed and overwhelmed.

 

I began to repent for the anger and resentment I felt towards my mom due to not feeling cared for. I joined Linda’s weekly energy healings online to release these dark emotions from my body. The energy release was experienced by physical reactions of twitching hands and movements in my legs, seeing a beautiful purple light in front of my eyes as I felt enveloped in the healing energy projected virtually. I felt the love of God and His presence and inner peace after the sessions.

 

As I moved deeper into my story from birth to five, these were the key patterns and beliefs that emerged that are impacting my life today. I was so surprised to see how I repeated living out patterns, beliefs, and dark emotions from my earliest childhood years.

 

Pattern: No consistent home – moving every 3-4 months

Belief: I’m not secure or grounded because I don’t have a secure home.

Emotional Bondage: Chaos, Fear, Panic, Not safe

 

In the first three years of my life, my family bounced between living in cabins provided by the camps where my dad worked summer and fall and renting an attic apartment in a farmhouse in winter and spring in Ohio.

 

The cottage where our family of five lived had two small bedrooms, an open kitchen and living room space, and wood paneling on every wall. The attic apartment was a smaller space with one bedroom, but the couple that owned the farmhouse treated us like their adopted family, welcoming us into their larger home below us. The wife even carried me home from the hospital in a blanket she crocheted for me!

 

Constantly moving from place to place made me feel like I was never secure or grounded, and things could shift and change in a moment. It also made me feel like anything or anyone could be taken away without warning.

 

The emotional bondage of fear of abandonment from the constant change manifested in my life by not leaving unhealthy situations and holding on tightly to my possessions. I stayed in jobs that I no longer enjoyed and saw coming to an end, yet I couldn’t bring myself to leave until they let me go.

 

I have a storage unit filled with things I no longer use or need. Through Linda’s intuitive counsel, I came to recognize these feelings of panic and fear are rooted in my childhood experience and don’t need to rule how I live now.

 

While I’m still holding onto unnecessary possessions, I’m aware that I need to let it all go. I’ve lived in my current apartment for two years. It feels like home and I’m responsible and taking care of myself.

 

Pattern: Poor & living in scarcity. Depending on others to provide for our needs.

Belief: We don’t have enough money, but our family and friends will come to our rescue.

Emotional Bondage: Poverty mindset, Fear, Panic, Greed

 

One year after my parents married, my dad completed graduate school, and they moved in with my mom’s parents. My dad admitted to me that he wasted time and didn’t seriously look for work.

 

Once my older brother was born, he finally found a job running a nature enrichment program for inner-city kids, but it was only for part of the year. He was dissociated from his responsibility to provide for his family. He made just enough to get by.

 

My mom desired to be a stay-at-home mom, but when I was two, she went back to work as a nurse part-time to help support us. We were never without food, clothes, or a roof over our head, but I learned to accept, and even expect, support from family, friends, and community to meet our needs. When my parents wanted to purchase a home, they again asked for help from my mom’s parents to gather the down payment.

 

After growing up with this energy of scarcity, of not having enough, I was constantly striving for more. It led to workaholism and an excellent salary, but without managing my income, money came in and went right back out. I worked so much that there was no room for pleasure or relationships in my life. Shopping sprees became my favorite pastime. I could fill my closet with the latest trends and fill my home with beautiful things, but the emptiness in my soul was still there. I had no savings, no retirement fund, and a massive amount of credit card debt.

 

Linda guided me and taught The Energy of Money to understand my feelings, patterns, and beliefs about money and why I was so out of control with it. She also encouraged me to take a financial course to learn how to budget and get out of debt.

 

I learned more about how God teaches us to steward money in the bible. I also worked with a financial planner to refine my budget and be accountable for my monthly spending. Not every month goes perfectly, but my spending is under control, and I’ve paid off $20,000 in debt so far!

 

Pattern: Performing and competing to be the center of attention.

Belief: I need to be liked and get attention to feel loved and valued.

Emotional Bondage: Unworthiness, Fear of rejection

 

As a child, I was always performing and trying to get attention from the adults and kids at the camp where we lived, making up for what I wasn’t getting from my mom. Growing up, I even felt I was competing with my brothers for her love and care. I would show off by winning races and games with the campers to prove how special I was. I turned it on when my dad would come home from work, knowing he had a special love for me as his only daughter, his little princess. I was even a performer and teacher’s pet at Sunday school.

 

This need to be number one continued throughout my life. I felt I had to act the way I thought people wanted me to be. Being myself was not enough because of a lack of self-confidence. I had to lie about who I was and how I felt, hiding behind a mask of perfection.

 

Linda helped me understand that I wasn’t fooling anyone, making it impossible for authentic relationships to develop. Practicing self-love exercises like writing down all my emotions has helped me accept all aspects of myself, light and dark, strengths and weaknesses, and not be afraid to be transparent.

 

She showed me that God could show up when I surrender to my shortcomings. If I think I can do it all independently, I don’t leave any room for God to work in my life. Once I let down my guard, I couldn’t believe how much easier it was to be. I still struggle with perfectionism and pleasing people, especially at work. I’m so thankful that I’m aware of this pattern and have the opportunity to work on changing it.

 

Pattern: Women in my family should all be married.

Belief: I need to be married to feel worthy as a woman.

Emotional Bondage: Fear of being alone.

 

My mom wanted to be a mother. When she married my father, she believed he would be responsible and provide for his family in his professional career with all his education. That didn’t happen, and yet she still stayed. Because of this I believed that I should be married and lasted twenty years in my own toxic marriage. I didn’t think I could get divorced because I thought it was wrong.

 

Understanding how emotional bondage can impact our physical body, I believe my mom’s suffering in her marriage resulted in her breast cancer due to emotions of resentment and bitterness. I didn’t want to end up the same!

 

God told me to get out of my marriage, and I didn’t have to be a victim anymore! Once I was ready to pursue a divorce, Linda helped me find a lawyer, supported me, and pushed when I needed it most to finish the process. I am finally free and comfortable being alone. It isn’t scary anymore because I know that God is always with me, and I’m learning to love and accept myself. I like spending time alone to get to know myself and God. In this loneliness, I gain peace.

 

Through the online sessions working with The Darin Method®, consistent Emotional Energy Healings online to remove deep-rooted dark emotions, chakra clearings, a powerful guided soul healing, and weekly virtual intuitive counseling sessions, God worked through Linda to begin to clear my soul of dark emotions and energies.

 

I began to feel lighter, inner joy, and I feel more whole. This journey of forgiveness for my family and myself, and repenting of my dark emotions, opened me up to an authentic relationship with God.

 

Attending church was a part of my childhood, but it wasn’t until I worked with Linda that I understood what it meant to be a Christian, witnessing her faith and trust in the power of God. God works healing through her, and my faith has been building through this process.

 

While at age 47, I’m still a work in progress, choosing to change and grow through the emotional healing and awareness The Darin Method® gave me is helping me live in a new way, welcoming God’s healing light and love into every part of my heart, mind, body, and soul.

 

Linda Darin is genuinely a God-send that saved me from a life of misery, pain, and suffering of my birth design that I didn’t realize I could change. I am so grateful for her love and compassion and a desire to bring me back to God. I highly recommend Linda and encourage you to experience the transformational power of The Darin Method® for yourself!